2 Months In.

I cant believe it's June. After yearning my way through the offseason, I feel like I've barely been to Fenway. I think I've seen 10 Sox games so far, so i'm more or less "on pace" to get to as many as I did last year- but it's all I want to do lately, which has become a problem while the team has been on the road for the past 2 weeks (nearly). It's surreal; I feel like I havent been to the park in ages. Meanwhile, I think I'm nearing the 20-game mark when it comes to the Paw Sox. I cant say for sure, but one of these days I'll get all of my ticket stubs together and see where I'm at. In all seriousness, going to Pawtucket has become what I imagine gum chewing is like for people who usually dip- a compulsive and necessary reaction to the absence of something I enjoy immensely. Thank goodness that when one team is on the road, the other is often at home; I rush home from work, hop in my car, sit in traffic and scream the day's angst away to the tune of Tessie or Spicy McHaggis or Blame It On The Rain, and make it to McCoy sometime within half an hour after the first pitch.

The Paw Sox are a tough team to watch, in my opinion, for a number of reasons ranging from the technical to the sentimental. For one, the pitching is pretty decent if you average it all out. We've got some stellar prospects, and some unremarkable guys too. But when it comes to the bats on this team, now there's the killer. It's really pathetic. Jeff Bailey, who was just this week dropped back down to make room for Mark Kotsay in the bigs, is hitting the ball around the .300 mark, but beyond that, you'll be hard-pressed to find someone on this team hitting over .265. When that's the best it gets, things are pretty bad. (Jeff Natale just came off the DL and i believe he is hitting over .300 for the moment... but he has been on and off the DL all season and his at bats count is incomparable with the guys who have been playing day to day.) I've seen Jonathan Van Every, who had a stellar stint with Boston to start the season, make more errors in center field and hit so poorly... I've seen daily starter Chip Ambres (the leader in BA, after Bailey and Natale who again have had incomplete seasons with Pawtucket to date) strike out 3 (i fear it may have even been 4) times in one somewhat recent extra-innings game... I've watched poor Gil Velazquez make error after error at SS, which still qualifies him to be making spot starts for Boston at this point (I recently read a column that stated something along the lines of "Julio Lugo is still up to his normal shenanigans at short stop".. well put, because at this point humor is all we've got). For these technical reasons and more, it's tough to sit and watch most other teams we face come up looking much sharper than we do. At this point, I have also developed favorites (though i generally like all of them, want to see them succeed), and so not only is it wince-worthy to see them working out the kinks night to night, but it's bittersweet to realize I cant keep them. I'm spoiled with the Red Sox... we've locked down some great players, and so the team of '08 (my rookie year with the Sox) is closely resembled in the team of '09, and will be for some time still. (PLEASE DO NOT BLOW IT WITH JASON BAY.) I have fierce love for a lot of our players, because they are gritty and tough and they're fighters, and they are heart and soul for Boston. The Paw Sox, though... I look out at the field, and I dont see many guys I can let myself get attached to in any longer-term sense. There's no room for infielders coming up, and as it stands now the outfield is pretty set too- the funny thing is, the organization's highest-touted up and coming outfielder isnt even at the AAA level yet. 

I'm at the point of free-flowing thought here, so why not jump into my anxiety over our pitching scene. I'll start by exclaiming YES! We have so many strong pitching options, that even when our rocks are struggling, we can patch it together and are none the worse for wear. I was injured by our rotation early on this season- I had so many high hopes, as did we all. Starting pitching was the least of Boston's concerns coming out of Spring Training. There's no need for me to recount what happened with Beckett, Lester, Dice-K, and Penny for the first 1.5 months. My trust was in Jon Lester, and I figured the others would follow suit; but I learned quickly that this was not to be the case. After a few sorely disappointing starts, I didnt even want to think about the starter of the night unless it was Wake; and the high I had ridden for the last half of the 2008 season with Petey and Lester dominating every chance they had simply did not pick up where it left off (Petey had a slow start too this season but I figured it couldnt last long). Fast-forward to just recently- Beckett had been showing signs of life over his last few starts, but my sigh of relief and my confidence in our rotation came back when Jon Lester became Jon Lester again, just this past week. If he can get another good one in there the next time he takes the mound, all will be right with the world.

So we've got a rotation that looks astounding on paper, and that is coming back around in reality (and that ultimately hasnt hurt us too badly even while struggling, if the standings are any indication). Look on any Boston MLB blog and you'll see at least one note about how, just below the 5 starters, we've got a bottleneck situation with John Smoltz, Justin Masterson, Clay Buchholz, and Michael Bowden. Fantastic- we've got options. But not so fantastic- the possibility that we might cut away some of the excess here by making a trade for, say, a SS or a DH (both sorely needed). If not for my own tendency towards sentimentality (including my desire to see young minor leaguers succeed) I would be just as excited as the next Boston sports analyst (read: any Boston fan, because as Boston fans we give our opinions as fact)... seems only natural to look at our depth and think of how we can best use it to our team's advantage. If we have TOO many pitchers (come on, any baseball enthusiast knows there is no such thing) and the market is in desperate demand for pitching, we can get whatever we need at a "lesser cost" to the organization. We have what we need as far as pitching goes, after all, so we have room to play around.

...Please, no. I'm desperate here in my hope that this is not the higher-ups' POV.

I'm thankful that I havent come face to face with Theo for a few months now. As it is, I all but forced Jed Hoyer to publicly pledge his commitment and devotion to Michael Bowden back in April. If I spot Theo around town, I fear that I will be in very real danger of throwing myself at his feet and begging, pleading for him to hang on to Michael Bowden and Daniel Bard. Clay Buchholz is still such a question mark in my mind, though I feel that he has the potential to become an excellent major league starter near or at the top of the rotation (depending on who's rotation he's in). So far this year, he has been looking like a big leaguer through the majority of his starts, so no complaints regarding Buchholz's AAA performance. Anyhow, that's a bit beside the point-  what I'm saying here is that I like these fellows. I like them very much, Bard and Bowden in particular. They're two who I want to add to the list of players I can allow myself to consider comfortable, dependable, home-grown Boston warriors, who grow to love the team and the city as our other guys who are here to stay do.. and as I do, too. I want Boston to be their home, and for them to become part of my home. I believe in the good things that they have to offer, if only they stick around long enough to get their respective chances.

I wont delete the last paragraph+, but it's not a very productive part of this entry. My bias, I will admit, is toward the young ones in general. I'm fascinated by them. The ones my age or younger in particular, well, they astound me.

No more trade rumors. They have been making me neurotic. Buchholz and Bowden are always on the chopping block, with fainter hints that the names Masterson, Bard, and Penny are frequently being mentioned in negotiations as well (though the latter doesnt seem to fit in this grouping of sought-after prospects... but there are so many rumors that Penny's gonna be a-movin on before long).

I'm so relieved that the Sox are back in town. I have missed them more than I had realized up until the past few days. Tonight I bought tickets for 6/11 vs the yankees... and i'll have to make it to a game this weekend vs texas so i can see Elvis Andrus. another exciting one.

Losing steam... time to wrap it up and head to bed. It's been a long week of Paw Sox games, and I'm ready to find myself back at Fenway in a couple days.

Adieu.